Welcome to Old Not Obsolete. This column was established on the firm principle that the 21st century has advanced far too quickly for its own good, and that someone needs to hold the handbrake until common sense catches up.

My name is Andy Hawthorne. I am a blogger, based in Coventry, England. I'm ageing and grumpy, or so I'm told. but I also like a laugh. This blog will be a mix of my life, my thoughts, and my observations on the world around me. There will be swearing.

I am a veteran, both military and of life. Raised on the principle of getting things done, the old-fashioned way. I have watched with growing horror as the simple act of existing in society has been transformed into a series of mandatory software updates and a lack of common sense.

The Columnist's Creed

I do not oppose genuine progress. Electric lighting is a fine invention; penicillin has its merits; and the indoor flushing toilet remains one of humanity's crowning achievements.

What I do object to is the relentless cancelling of things we used to find funny. It's getting out of hand.

I also object to the endless amount of updates we have to do on everything. Why can't things just stay as they are?

Dispatches from Fleet StreetCoventry

I moan about things a lot. And I don't half complain about ageing. Wait until you get here. it's shit, let me tell you. Each week—or whenever my lumbar spine allows—I publish fresh dispatches chronicling the absurdity of modern life, the decay of traditional pub snacks, the mysteries of modern jargon, and the triumph of staying steadfastly stuck in my ways.

"The world may belong to the young, the nimble, and the app-developers. But the moral high ground belongs to those of us who still remember how to write a cheque and laugh at fart jokes."

Thank you for reading. Should you wish to express your agreement—or your polite outrage—please send a stamped addressed envelope to my back garden, Coventry, or simply subscribe to our RSS feed below.